You know.. I should really change the little blurb on the left to...

Hi. Welcome to my blog, as I describe every gruesome detail on my progress toward death.

My friend jokingly said that I probably have SARS and should not come near him... Yes, what started out to be just your usual severe vomiting and diarrhea has finally evolved into grave coughing and muscle aches. I think the worst has come -- this season's notorious flu (the one for which they ran out of vaccines, the one that killed several children) has finally settled in. Full-fledged! Just when I thought I was spared!

I actually didn't feel so bad this morning, and thought that I was finally recovering. I coughed a little, but disregarded it as something trivial. Boy, was I wrong. By sunset, I was coughing like I was trying out for the coughing record for the Guiness Book of Records! I still am. In a matter of minutes, I will consume two soft gels of Vicks Dayquil (I don't have Nyquil, which is more appropriate, seeing as this is night, and being a poor starving student, money doesn't come easily enough to afford both daytime and nighttime medicines!) and clasp my hands together and hope earnestly that it works.

I have to attend church tomorrow morning -- I promised my best friend. I would argue that I am deathly ill and cannot go to a place of worship that has nothing to do with me as I have forsaken god just as he has me, but I often lose arguments with my best friend. If I make the futile attempts at argument (not an altercation, mind you, just a little discussion among two very dear friends), we usually end up in some massive fight where we don't speak to each other for a couple of days. Seeing that she is only here for 3 weeks, a fight of such length would be inappropriate. So I sigh and resign to attending the bloody gore that is church. The most bothersome part of it is that it takes place on Sunday, and of all hours, in the AM! It's waaaaaaaay too early (forgive me for my lack of adjectives) to clap and sing and pretend to pray. With my frank personality, I wouldn't be surprised to find myself not standing when asked, and not closing my eyes during prayers, but just blatantly showing disrespect for the Christian all-mighty in his territory would make me fear getting hit by lightning when I leave the area. Although he isn't quite like Zeus -- I'm not quite sure about the lightning, but I'm sure he has his ways to take vengence -- as though I were the next anti-christ!

Long story short (I know... it's too late) I will be prim and proper and coughing like mad at church tomorrow morning. If I don't update my blog in the next couple of days, just accept the fact that the savage church-goers (come on -- having to get up on a Sunday morning? I'm sure everyone would be on their most savage behaviour!) have thrown me into the midst of hell, where I will live in a blog-less eternal world. Burning wouldn't be so bad, seeing as I'm freezing off my arse as we speak. Or write.