Gotta Love Sarcasm

Click here to read this hilarious article. It's sarcastic, to say the least. But it kind of gets weird toward the end... acorns? What do they have to do with Martha Stewart?

Looking into the Future

Now that I'm finally going to be a Junior in college (I'm going to remain optimistic and hopeful about the situation), I think it is time that I prepare for the future. Until now, the future was just about getting into a nursing program so I can get some things settled (y'all know what they are, let's not get into the details). But now, that's been settled (more or less) and I'm going to be a Junior in college this winter. It is probably a good time to start contemplating about graduate school -- I know many people delay going to graduate school after doing undergrads for many reasons -- to take a break from it all, to gain field experience, whatevers. But I personally like to dive into things and continue a rhythm. It is difficult to go back to school after you've been away for a while -- believe me, I know!

I am a planner. I plan things. I love to plan things. I like to make lists. I like makiing lists so much that sometimes I'll include tasks I've already completed, just to increase the number of items on the list (and it also boosts my mood, knowing that I've completed some things). As y'all may know, I like making lists so much that I not only make one plan -- I make plan B as a back up, and then I make plan C as a back up to a back up, and sometimes, I even make a few more back up plans after that. I also like pro/con lists, but that's another story.

So what exactly would I need to do to prepare for graduate school? I've done scant research so far -- most of my research for education was for nursing programs and undergraduate work. I know the basics -- I'll need good grades, and I'll have to take some sort of entrance exam, whether it be the GRE or the GMAT or the MCAT and so on. Probably the first step I need to take is to decide what subject I will be studying.

For a while there, I had been thinking about doing the English thing, perhaps literature. Then I thought that the best thing for me to do to secure myself career-wise as well as financially, would be to do more nursing -- it would spring me into a teaching position at a college faster than one can say ibuprofen. Then there's my ultimate dream ever -- to go to medical school. The truth of the matter is, I'm a jack of all trades but a master of none. I love to do a lot of things and I manage to be adequately skilled in many areas, but I can't pinpoint to just one thing, nor do I excel in one specific area above all others.

How does one make such life-altering decisions? Decisions are hard for me -- look at me! I can't even decide what model iPod to get! The 20 G iPod, or the mini iPod? For months! I'm still surprised that I actually decided on the digital camera I wanted and have yet to have regretted the purchase. But it was nerve-wrecking to press that "checkout" button at Amazon.com to purchase it. Creating options and planning are easy for me, but making decisions and executing them have proven to be quite difficult.

And it isn't as though I can go to graduate school several times -- it wouldn't be efficient to get a graduate degree in English, then go to grad school again for nursing. And it will be more and more difficult to go to med school as I get older and older. With endless possibilities for choices, you can understand my dillema and concern. But on the upside, I can make new and more plans now. Time to whip out the daily planner!

November is National Novel Writing Month

I know November is still a good time away. But just to get into the preparation of it, I'll jump the gun. November is National Novel Writing Month. Who declared it, I dunno, but it's well-known.

I don't realistically think that I would be a novelist. One problem I see is that I can't commit. I will never be able to decide on what iPod to buy, or what color to paint my walls. For some reason I have an extreme difficulty in making irreversible decisions.

Then again, who knows if I may write a novel or not? These days, anybody who's anybody is writing a book, whether it is fictional or not. The Clintons, Madeline Albright, Ann Coulter, Elizabeth Dole -- I mean, they have full rights to write an autobiography if they want, but their numbers are shooting up into the sky. I'm surprised Dubya hasn't popped out with one himself -- perhaps after he retires from politics. So why not me?

NaNo WriMo is holding a contest, to write 50,000 words in 30 days. Is 50,000 words enough to be a novel? How many pages would this be? After punching some numbers, I came out with about 1667 words per day. That doesn't seem like a lot. Of course, if you're writing fiction and all the elements of the work has to come out of your ass (alluding to my brother's favorite saying "I picked it out of my ass"), it might be tougher. I can usually write a good 1500 word essay in a day, and then put some more words in on my blog and so on. On average I probably write about 800-1000 words a day, possibly up to 1500 on a hyper day. Can it really be that difficult? Of course, writing quality material is another story. NaNo WriMo's contest doesn't include quality as part of their requirement -- it's not that they want poorly written novels -- they want writers to write for the sake of writing, without fear of the need to revise, without hindrance. Sort of like an exercise.

I've decided to take the plunge, just to see what I come up with. Of course, that is, if my computer can be fixed in the near future. There is just no way for me to handwrite 1667 words a day. What am I, dumb?

I have made a few novelist friends through blogs in the last few months/years, and I don't mean to downplay their efforts on their novels. Of course writing novels is difficult. It's painstaking, I whole-heartedly agree. My purpose would be to see if I can actually commit myself into writing something, anything, and keep up with it for an extended period of time (and 30 days for me is truly like a lifetime). It's about committing to something, a project, and working to reach a goal. I don't think I've reached a goal in a long time. It's mostly due to my inherent lack of dilligence and persistence. I may sound cocky to say so, but I'm brilliant -- but too bad I don't have the work-ethics to make it work. So I need my computer now.

Technical Difficulties

I am still having problems with my computer. Ugh. Hate this feeling of loneliness.

But my other technical problem happened two months ago. I did not know this until this week. I am an international student. That is something I must indicate to the schools to which I submit an application. And I have. Or so I thought.

I called up CSULA to ask them how I can process my I-20 (don't ask -- it's just a piece of paper required for international students). They were puzzled. Why would you need an I-20? I told them that I was a F-1 visa student. And then they broke it to me; it appears that on my application (electronically filed) that I have indicated that I was a US citizen. "That can't be right," I said. But it was. I went back and checked the application, and it did say US Citizen. I don't know how it happened. I checked the application at least three times, thoroughly, from beginning to end before pressing submit! It wasn't my intention to fool the admissions office. It really wasn't the case at all!

I had sent in my transcripts with my affadavit of support, as well as the supplementary international student application, so they had that. The person on the other line had said that she will submit all this information to the supervisor, and I should hear something by mail in three to four weeks. Three to four weeks!?

As you all know, I have applied for the F-1 visa. If it doesn't come through, then I'm pretty much doomed. But since I don't have the visa, I may not be able to attend CSULA until I either receive the visa or get my rejection, but not before I get the notice. Or I may still be able to attend. I don't know. So my matriculation is uncertain as it is. I didn't want my acceptance to be jeopardized as well.

So I'm very conflicted and worried as hell. This was a big opportunity for me to finally bust out of community college mode. To move onto bigger and better things, as they say. Apparently I'll need to wait until mid Novemberish to find out. Life is tormenting, to say the least. Ups and downs. It seems like I haven't quite gotten around to accepting the full implications of this blow though (I know it in my mind, but it might not have registered in my heart) because I remain strangely optimistic. Perhaps this is denial. Whatever it is, I hope it cushions enough for a possible catastrophic event. Which I hope I don't have to face.

The President has been Decided

"Kid power! Democrat John Kerry is the winner, and the rest of the country should pay attention because the vote on Nickelodeon's Web site has correctly chosen the president of the United States in the past four elections."

How wonderful is this? (Apart from the fact that Kerry won, but because kids are learning to speak up -- looks like the future is in good hands!)

Good or Bad? Good or Bad?

Read the Article Here

Women's oral contraceptives -- it has been studied over and over and each time a new study is done, it has different results. First it was bad; it caused breast cancer. Then it was good because it reduced cervical and other forms of cancer because it reduced endometriosis. Then it was bad only if you smoked or had history of hypertension or heart disease. Now it is good again (although that bit about smoking and hypertention still holds true)?

There has got to be a better way (and no I won't consider slapping on a sticky pad on my ass).

Yowzah!

It's a deliciously dark and gloomy day here in SoCal. My computer is still out of commission -- I forced my brother to stick his head inside my computer and smell the nasty smell coming from within. He pretended to look and said that it's probably my power supply. Then he went back to watching Love Hina or Naruto or whatevers it is that he is watching now. I'm assuming he'll order a new power supply within the next month or so!

So due to unforseen technical difficulties, I am coming to you from my mother's computer. We're one dorky family -- there's three of us, and we have three computers and three phones. And we live in a really small place, a two bedroom apartment barely big enough to hold all of our stuff. I am having an unpleasant time because my mom's computer is just not my computer. Even my work comp feels better, because I have either tweaked the settings to suit me, or I have gotten used to the setting. My mom's comp is set to 800x600 resolution. Her chair doesn't feel right. Her mouse is wireless and sometimes does strange things (like the cursor jumping from one corner of the screen to another) and her wireless keyboard is also one of those natural keyboards where the board is curved to fit the hands ergonomically (which wreaks havoc, because I use my left hand to type the letter "y"). Kinda weird, considering I bought her the keyboard and the mouse for mother's day. I would have expected better from Microsoft though -- this keyboard does not have an indicator light, so there is no way to tell if the NUM LOCK or CAP LOCK are on unless you start typing. Also, the translucent grey wheel on the mouse looks like a grey caterpillar. Gross.

It's a bit chilly out. I have been doing some research to see what I would need to do to prepare for my transition into my new school. Looks like I'll finally have to get that Hepatitis B shot, as well as another chest X-Ray to prove that I don't have tuberculosis. Also, one of those annual physical exams -- which in my case won't be annual, because I haven't been to the doctor for a check-up since I was about 7 years of age.

I'm sure I've mentioned somewhere in my blog before, but I have a lot of phobias. It is a wonder how I can even go through a single day with all the phobias I have. I am deathly frightened of insects as well as spiders, or other "more-than-4-legged" creatures, such as centipedes and scorpions, as well as pseudopods, like worms (worms are pseudopods...?). I even fear the lady bug -- although they are exquisite works of the almighty, and quite beautiful to look at, I can't make myself get too physically close to it, even if it is just a photograph. I can catch a rat with my own two hands, but if there's a roach, I'll be leaving the building promptly and not return for a good deal of time.

I also have a deathly fear of heights. I made a big mistake going on a ferris wheel. You should have seen me. I was yelling at everyone in the same car, "STOP SHAKING!" and screaming downwards, "GET ME DOWN NOW!" I have also been known to cry on rollercoasters -- I wince on rides like Viper (see Magic Mountain/Six Flags webpage on details of the rides), but on something like Colossus, I simply cry my heart out as my life flashes before my eyes. Well, you may not know this, but when you're on a roller coaster ride, and you're crying and screaming, you often lose time to breathe. So when I got out of Colossus, I was out of breath and dizzy -- nearly fainted!

One of my other fears -- one that may significantly affect my life, is my fear of needles. I have actually passed out during an epidural, also called lumbar injection, and it wasn't even my own epidural -- I was shadowing a doctor and watching from afar! So needles, really freak me out. Although I have mustered up some immunity to seeing needles, it really envelopes me with fear. I also get pain from seeing needles -- a nurse told me that it was from "sympathy pains." One time I was helping to hold down a baby when he was being tested for meningitis (the fluid in the spinal cord is collected to run the test for the infection), which involved an extremely thick needle (you can't have a small needle when you're trying to puncture it through the spinal cord!), on a baby less than a year old, no less. You would not believe the amount of pain I had in the small of my back!

While I didn't pass out during my second encounter with an epidural, the thought of needles still makes me feel irksome. It was also many years ago since I saw something like an epidural -- 7 years, actually, so I may not be as tolerant as before. It is the most difficult challenge I will face during my academic training as a nurse. Splashes of blood here and there, guts getting strewn about, those things don't bother me at all. I've seen cadavers (one of the proud few of my classmates (during a field trip to a cadaver lab) who didn't run out and vomit) and they're interesting to me. Organs are lovely. Dissecting dead cats are fun! (And I am a cat-owner) Needles penetrating skin is just not cool at all. Ugh.

I still have some time to get used to the idea -- I'll be breaking the ice with the idea with my hepatitis shot, I suppose (which takes three shots on three different occassions). Until then, Richard the Third must be read, so here I go.

Did some reading of The Other Boleyn Girl last night (having an invalid computer gives me ample time to read) and found it not nearly as dull as I had imagined previously -- it is getting more and more interesting!

Rain

Drizzle... drizzle...

It's the End of the World...

My computer at home crashed several times yesterday. Despite my extrenuous effors to bring it back to life, it kept on crashing. And it wasn't even the usual blue screen -- it was blue, but it had a different message. It kind of felt like the telephone error message: "... if you feel you've reached this message in error, hang up and try again..." Only, it was: "...if you have no clue what's wrong with your computer, please restart your system again..." And I could turn the damned thing back on, and it felt okay about 10 minutes or so, and then it crashed. That happened about, oh, 7 times. And the scary thing was, at the bottom of that blue screen, it said something like, "Dumping physical memory: 1, 2, 3..." It actually used the word, "dumping" and "memory."

When I got the thing running temporarily, I ran various adware-zapping programs, and ran a virus check, did disk cleanup, but nothing helped. I am just so deathly afraid of losing the stuff stored in my computer -- I have come to be totally dependent on my computer! I have a lot of my written works, although they're in-progress works, saved onto my hard drive, along with various saved html files, a truckload of mp3 files, and so on. I'll feel like my house burned down in a fire if I lose all that. Ugh!

I'm going to have to bother my brother about getting the situation fixed/salvaged, but as he is so busy these days, I may have to fend for myself in this matter. I'm not as much a computer geek as I may seem; repairing problems is not my strong suit. But at this point, I may have to learn how and just do it myself.