Another Stress Reliever

Bitch-slapping is always a great stress reliever. Hmm... too bad I can't do this in real life.

Brilliant Idea!

I'm sure y'all had one "Eureka!" moment or another, when a light bulb suddenly flashed in your head, and you find a fab solution for a problem. I had such an epiphany today, on the drive home.

I spoke to my lawyer's assistant/secretary/legal aide (what is her title? I don't know!) and found that my lawyer has yet to have an update for me on my current uncomfortable immigration situation. Since the whole situation is looking rather dim, I started to turn the wheels in my head and started thinking. As you all may know, marriage to a citizen is one of the fastest and easiest ways to get yourself a green card in the US. However, I have already indicated that I refuse to debase my moral standards.

I started to think, or imagine, actually. I started thinking about what if I just decided to get married. I mean, Korean people of marry-able age often meet other eligible bachelors and bachelorettes through a matchmaker. It is very common, in fact, and you will find that many Koreans of the older generation married this way. It's not all that popular nowadays, but it still goes on. I imagined that I would meet this man, who only came because he was pressured by his parents. Despite the fact that he is gorgeous looking, he is still single, because he is gay, which his parents do not know. He wants to get his parents off his back, but does not want to go through the whole "coming-out" process. I mean, having Korean parents who are anxious for you to get married is anguish enough!

Well, then my rational side started to kick in and questioned: why would this gay man want to go through the whole charade? I mean, getting married is much more of a hassle than staying single. What would be his incentive? So I invented one. This man would have a gay lover. They have been together for some time and wanted to start a family. However, adoption laws have made it difficult for gay parents to adopt a child. His incentive for marrying me would be to use the marriage as a ploy to adopt a child. When a child gets adopted, and I get my green card, we would go our merry little ways.

But wait! Is that really a happy ending? Who knows if I'll ever have children? This adopted child may be the closest thing to an offspring that I'll ever have! So I daydreamed that my gay ex-husband and his lover, the adopted child and myself, would live happily ever after as the ultimate dysfunctional American family.

That is when I realized that this is not a sound plan; it was an outline for a soon-to-be-a-hit-movie novel that I may or may not write. Plus, I don't know any gay people. Yes, oddly enough, I have never come across one at a personal level -- I have heard of gay people. I'm sure they exist somewhere, but for some reason, they have chosen not to enter my realm. For a good reason too, I mean, who would even think up these kooky plans? And I am positive that I have insulted more than a few members of the gay community because I am just so not PC**. Ugh! Is it ok to say gay? Or is it homosexual? And is "gay lover" a correct term? Or should I just say "his boyfriend?" I can't write this novel unless I can actually know gay people and get comfortable with that whole thing. How can I write a story with a prominent gay character when I myself don't even know one? It would be like a nun trying to write a porn screen play.

Interesting gay men in the area, you can e-mail me via the link on your left. Perhaps my dream can come true. (Yup, it is every gal's dream to marry a gay man!)

**If I have in any way offended anyone reading, please remember that me no speak English, and I just lack the finesse of being polite... I did not in any way mean to offend or make fun of or anything like that. I'm just not PC, that's all. I'm a blunt dull blade. Forgive me.

Terror Warning

Please consider yourselves warned: there is a terror threat in So Cal -- at shopping centers. So keep away from malls this weekend! I'm sure nothing will happen. but with something like life, you just have to play it safe. I wonder if it would affect me... I live right next to a mall. Oh well. Terrorist attack, 10.5 earthquake, whatever.

I feel like crap. My entire body aches, from head to toe. Ok, that's a lie. From head to hips. I am in immense pain, and will be going to sleep a lot earlier than usual. Now. Yes, for the first time in ages, I am sleeping before midnight. Whoopee.

No Title, Just Watch

Stress Reliever

Click Here for some intense stress therapy! Just use your mouse on the image. I guarantee that you will be heavily addicted, but it's better to vent on something like this than on someone real. Hee.

An Unhappy Place, Brought to You By the Happiest Place on Earth

Yahoo! News - Comcast Abandons Takeover Bid for Disney

I had a Roxanne (from Cyrano de Bergerac) moment. I thought I loved Disney. But it turned out that what I actually loved, was Pixar. Pixar will separate from Disney, and since all recent hits have been done by Pixar, Disney seems to be in trouble. They must turn out a success -- if their first animated film sans Pixar is a failure, the image of Disney will be irrevocable. Disney is also in the process of changing their CEO -- whether or not to keep Mr. Eisner. I'm not sure if said Mr. Eisner is doing a great job, but I don't know if there would be someone who can take up the task and succeed, despite the heavy burden that currently lies in place. Since Comcast has now withdrawn the bid to take over Disney, Disney is pretty much without a choice, as far as saving their asses go. I'm interested in seeing how Disney fares without Pixar, and while I am an immense fan of Disney, I have a significant cloud of doubt hovering.

Great Advertisement

A piano company advertisement with a hidden agenda...(?)

I don't know about you, but I was moved! I want a piano now. And. World Peace.

Sizzling

It was 100 F today. Or 38 Celcius. It was HOT. The breeze felt like I was inside of an oven preset to 400 degrees. My blog at Naver.com has been set up. The URL is: http://blog.naver.com/califlower.do

It's not fantastic yet, but at least I got the ball rolling. My original writing site will be started sometime next month, perhaps in a month or so. Ay. It's late. Good night.

Naver Account Set-Up Complete!

My registration with Naver.com is now complete! I can make a "cafe" or start a blog, or both! The best thing about these sites in Korea, is that there are so many great sites on education. Korea is one country that values education with the utmost importance, if that makes sense. Of course there are other countries too, but Korea especially. I think part of it is that the country is still relatively a difficult place to live -- there is no American Dream. To dream that a person of modest upbringing, especially a woman, can become a CEO or someone rich or influential or famous, is utterly foolish. So competition is fierce -- you have to fight to maintain middle class status. So obviously, education is stressed heavily. Unfortunately, it does lead to many kids jumping off of buildings from too much stress.

I found a plethora of sites that hold genuine interest and efforts in learning a new language. Mostly English, but plenty of ones dedicated to learning/teaching Spanish, French, Japanese, Chinese, and so on. I've already registed with a few Spanish ones and one French. It's motivating to find people who are so dedicated to learning a new language. These people, in their free time, are actually participating in blogs and cafes on the internet to learn more. That's truly inspiring.

I browsed a bit, and eventually landed on this riddle. If you can read Spanish, you can read it and try to solve the problem! It took me a while to solve it... my math skills have seriously deteriorated...

Van tres amigos a cenar a un restaurante. Despues de la cena, al pedir la cuenta, es donde viene el 'sarao'. > Amigos : Camarero... nos saca la cuenta, por favor. > Camarero : Son 30 euros, caballeros. Y cada uno de ellos pone 10 euros. Cuando el camarero va a poner el dinero en caja, lo ve el jefe y le dice: > Jefe : No, esos son amigos mios. Cobrales solo 25 euros. El camarero se da cuenta que si devuelve los 5 euros puede haber 'follon' para repartirlos y decide lo siguiente: > Camarero : Ya esta. Me quedare 2 euros y les devuelvo 3, uno para cada uno. Les devuelve a cada uno 1 euro. Ahora es cuando viene el follon. Si cada uno puso 10 euros y les devuelven 1euro, realmente puso cada uno de ellos 9 euros. 9 x 3 = 27 euros. Si a?adimos los dos que se queda el camarero, = 29 euros...................... DONDE ESTA EL OTRO PUTO EURO ???

This came from: http://cafe.naver.com/hujubispanish.cafe.

Ok. Nothing original to post today, so I found this. It's boring, but enjoy.

I don't know whose blog I got this off from, but whoever created this, I give credit to you.

LAYER ONE: -- Name: Haemi -- Birth date: July 31, 1980 -- Birthplace: Seoul, Korea -- Current Location: Los Angeles, CA -- Eye Color: Brown -- Hair Color: Mousy Brown -- Height: 5'6" -- Righty or Lefty: Righty -- Zodiac Sign: Leo

LAYER TWO: -- Your heritage: Korean -- The shoes you wore today: Black platform thongs -- Your weakness: Chocolate, eBay -- Your fears: Poverty, Deportation, Illness -- Your perfect pizza: Must have pineapples -- Goal you'd like to achieve: Get ejookaited

LAYER THREE: -- Your most overused phrase on AIM: OMG & WTF? -- Your first waking thoughts: Oy~ -- Your best physical feature: Porcelain skin -- Your most missed memory: Annual trips to Catalina Island

LAYER FOUR: -- Pepsi or Coke: Diet Vanilla Coke -- McDonald's or Burger King: Mickey D?s all the way -- Single or group dates: I don't date. -- Adidas or Nike: Neither -- Ferragamos. -- Lipton Ice Tea or Nestea: Nestea's Raspberry Ice Tea, or Peach Ice Tea -- Chocolate or vanilla: Why not Chocolate AND Vanilla? -- Cappuccino or coffee: Black Coffee

LAYER FIVE: -- Smoke: Nope. -- Cuss: I'm Miss Prim-n-Proper. -- Sing: Frequently. -- Take a shower everyday: Usually. -- Do you think you've been in love: Never. -- Want to go to college: I am going to college and will continue to go to college as long as life permits. -- Liked high school: Somewhat. But I was an ubergeek. -- Want to get married: Perhaps. -- Believe in yourself: What else would I believe? -- Get motion sickness: Nope. -- Think you're attractive: Fairly attractive. I'm no Gisele, but I'll do. -- Think you're a health freak: Nope. -- Get along with your parent(s): Well enough. -- Like thunderstorms: Sure. -- Play an instrument: Piano, violin, and I can blow on the clarinet and sometimes it makes a big noise!

LAYER SIX: In the past month... -- Drank alcohol: What are you, kidding? Of course! -- Smoked: Nope. -- Done a drug: No. -- Made Out: No. -- Gone on a date: Nope. -- Gone to the mall?: Yes. -- Eaten an entire box of Oreos?: What size box? -- Eaten sushi: Oh yes. Can't live without it! -- Been on stage: Nope. -- Been dumped: Nope. -- Gone skating: I don?t do shoes with wheels, OR shoes with blades. -- Made homemade cookies: Storebought cookies for me. Unless it is those pre-packaged cookie dough. -- Dyed your hair: Nope. -- Stolen Anything: Nope.

LAYER SEVEN: Ever... -- Played a game that required removal of clothing: Nope. -- If so, was it mixed company: I said NO. -- Been trashed or extremely intoxicated: Miss Prim, I said. -- Been caught "doing something": I do a lot of things, none which I am not proud of. -- Been called a tease: I'm not the tease type. -- Gotten beaten up: Only verbally. -- Shoplifted: Uh. No. -- Changed who you were to fit in: We all adapt to survive in society.

LAYER EIGHT: -- Age you hope to be married: BACK OFF! I don't even know if I ever want to! -- Numbers and Names of Children: I?m naming one Gilbert, and another one Chloe, and another one Wesley. -- Describe your Dream Wedding: Something simple that won't stress me out. -- How do you want to die: I don't know if I want to. -- Where you want to go to college: Anywhere good education is available. -- What do you want to be when you grow up: The woman who's got it all. -- What country would you most like to visit: Practically everywhere. At the moment, Tahiti sounds delicious.

LAYER NINE: -- Number of drugs taken illegally: (Just) Two, unless you count underage drinking. -- Number of people I could trust with my life: Just my mom. -- Number of CDs that I own: You really want me to count? -- Number of piercings: Three, all in the ears. -- Number of tattoos: Too painful. -- Number of times my name has appeared in the newspaper?: I don't know. -- Number of scars on my body: Very little, if any. Again, I'm Miss Prim and Proper. I don't do scars. -- Number of things in my past that I regret: Not too many. Exact number N/A.

I've got a rolled up Tissue up my Nose

Care to guess why? Just now, all of a sudden, my nose started bursting with blood. Left nostril to be exact. Pouring blood, a la Kill Bill. Ok, that is an exaggeration, but quite a bit of blood. This happened about three weeks ago, and this is my second outburst. FYI, I did not pick my nose! Both times!

Weather: Hot. Me: Not So Hot

It's fabulous outside. But I can't be sure, because I was home all day. I am slightly under the weather -- I knew I should have moved away from that guy in English class, who had the miserable cold. He was sitting behind me, and I could have sworn that he sneezed on me. Also, the snortling in of liquid snot, as well as the extensive exodus of snot via fierce blowing onto tissue, wasn't all that pleasant a scenery as it would seem. Having a miserable cold when it's miserably hot is the worst. I hope (crossing fingers) I don't come down with anything too SARS-like.

It was hot today. Hotter than hot -- it was scorching. I had to slap my wrists every time they tried to reach the thermostat to turn on the AC, because being frugal means suffering while saving. Apparently, more suffering than saving. Summer has gotten a bit ahead of itself this year. It's just scorching! We are expected to break 90 in the upcoming week. It was so hot, and I felt so dead that I couldn't make it to the gym, once again. I know, that's just an excuse, but I couldn't move around much. The fact that my local gym prefers the fan instead of the AC doesn't help much either. Hello! It's a place where people are getting hot and sweaty! It would help to keep temps low! But that's just my opinion.

When I get a chance, I'll have to talk about treadmill users who fart. I would spare y'all from that insanity, but it is just something I can't keep to myself. Here's a preview: please tell everyone you know, don't fart while using the treadmill, or any exercise equipment. Just because it doesn't make a sound DOES NOT mean it doesn't make a smell. A poopoo smell! Yeck!

So on this hot day, I spent a lot of time just watching. Then I spent some time with Hamlet, and then some time with The Simpsons. I also watched Kill Bill, Vol. 1. Very interesting and gory. I'd love to see Vol 2, but as always, I will frugally wait for the DVD to hit Blockbusters.

Last Thursday, I decided. I will most likely never finish One Hundred Years of Solitude. I've always said as a joke, that it would take me one hundred years to finish the damned thing, but it turns out, it is most likely to be true. Since I can safely assume that I have less than cien anos (I can't type it, but there is a tilde on top of the "n" in anos) of life left, I will deduce through logic that the task is virtually impossible. So I said to myself, it would be a shame living life without reading something by ole Gabriel (Gabriel Garcia Marquez, that is). I went to the library and borrowed "El amor en los tiempos del colera." Love in the time of cholera. It's another one that he wrote, which is also quite famous. But this one, I will be reading it as ole Gabe wrote it: in Spanish.

I know y'all are gasping. But it is true. I can't speak Spanish like a Spaniard, but I can speak it better than most non-hispanics I know. (My old boss, who was the same age as I am, is Korean. But she lived in Paraguay since she was little, and lived there until the age of adulthood.) My reading is much better than my speech though, because I can take some time to think and analyze.

I probably won't finish this novel either, and I can say this for two different reasons. First, because I have not finished the first novel I attempted to read by Garcia Marquez, I may face similar difficulties, i.e. get bored out of my mind. Secondly, since it is in a language other than the ones I am completely fluent in, it may take more time. I decided just to take a few pages at a time, just three to five pages. I'll have a trusty Eng-Span dictionary by my side. It is about 500 pgs, so at 5 pages per day, it should take me about 4 months or so. Even so, it would take less time than Cien Anos de Soledad, so what a relief, huh?

I am doing this because I will definitely need my Spanish later in my life, and since it has been over half a decade since I took my last Spanish class, I will need to keep exercising my command over the language. My ability to speak has nearly atrophied since I quit my job at Hola Com (where my boss was the formerly mentioned Korean girl, who was an evil person, by the way -- even more evil than normal evil, because she appeared innocuous, when it was so clear to me that she was the vilest creature to roam the earth. I'll have to tell my future therapist about that). Sometimes when I do get Hispanic customers, I am surprised by the amount I had retained, but dissappointed by the amount lost.

Well, if I can ever get to my Awakening criticical essay, I'd be in heaven. It was supposed to be due last Thurs, but the instructor gave in and gave an extra weekend. It is now due Tuesday. Of course, as everyone knows, I'll be working on it tomorrow night, frantically jotting down an outline past midnight. I tell you, one day, my procrastination will catch up with my horrid habits.