Here's what I am doing now:

It says:
The wash-off type pack contains carrot and tomato extracts which are excellent for brightening and moisturizing the skin, keeping it firm and radiant.
How to use: Apply a suitable amount onto the face, spreading it evenly with the fingertips and rinse off with warm water after 10 minutes. Then, apply toner afterwards.

A beauty regimen is a demanding thing. After I "wash-off" this "wash-off pack" I will go get some beauty rest, otherwise known as sleeping while snoring loudly.

I gave in and paid the $5 to Villagephotos.com so that I can do external linking of pictures to my website. I guess I could have tried to find a cheaper place, but I think this is pretty cheap as it is. And I really did not wish to re-upload all those pictures all over at another host, so there. Sometimes being frugal (or froogle) is not worth it. It's $5 for the next six months, so it's less than a buck a month, and it's also about 3 cents a day, and I think I can afford that. I'll have to call the bank and see if I actually can afford that, just to be sure.

I spent last night talking with my best friend over some white zinfandel. I went to bed at about 1:30 AM-ish, while she stayed awake and got ready to depart to Iowa. She woke me up at about 4:20 AM, and we left for the LAX. It was a quick drive, quite painless, because of the car pool lane, and because it was during ungodly AM hours on a Saturday morning. I think 5 AM is about as bad as it gets -- it's like the witching hour, for me at least. We got to the airport at about 5:30 AM, it was a brisk half-hour drive.

I haven't seen many airports in my life, but I think from the few I've seen (and I've seen a couple of large ones) LAX is the prettiest. It always provokes nostalgia in the sweetest way, like the Solomon's Seal Tea that reminds me of Korea as it warms me to my feet. The entrance is marked by large columns -- they are made from a unique material, half transparent and yet half opaque, and during the dark hours it is lighted, and the larger than life poles, surrounding the larger than life letters "LAX" glow in various colors, a soft green, a humble blue, sometimes a mild magenta. I usually end up going to the LAX either late at night or early in the morning, like I did today. The wee hours of the morning is the best time to be at the LAX. It is still filled with a flood of people, all rushing to get somewhere, and yet there is a sense of peace -- it is quiet, as though the cool air mutes the crowd.

There were signs stating a heightened security alert, and the LAX Police all over, roaming the airport like dark black ants crawling on the asphalt. They even stopped my car and searched the trunk, and scanned the bottom of my car for potential bombs and weapons. But there is a powerful force of the LAX that makes it not as harsh as it sounds.

We didn't find the airport to be busy, so we decided to have breakfast at Denny's -- we planned to have breakfast every time but never find that time, but after years of waiting, we finally do have that time. We don't say much. The potential "good-bye" is looming, but it is sometimes good to procrastinate it. We quickly have bites to eat and go back to the LAX to drop off her luggage. By 6:50 AM we are done, and she lingers at the entrance for passengers only -- she has an hour until her flight, and we debate whether we should wait a few minutes or perhaps she should just go. The thought process is made instantaneously, and without saying so, we just give each other a half-assed hug. It's not the complete hug that we shared when we met just 3 weeks ago. It is quick, and we don't even hold each other much. If all good-byes were so painless!

She turns around and makes her way in, and at the same rate I turn around and exit the building. I turn around and linger in the doorway, hoping to be able to wave good-bye once, but decide against it because a sudden surge of hot tears filled my eyes. I blink to prevent it from flooding, and quickly walk away, as though if I didn't, I'd go back in and cry.

It was an ethereal morning, for which I am thankful. The pink sunrise gave my eyes much pleasure, and the drive home was mildly pleasant as well. It had only been a few minutes since I left her, and it was dark then. At 7AM it was bright, filled with daylight. It gave me a renewed feeling, like I just came back from the fountain of youth. I thought about how I don't know when I'll see my best friend next. She might come back in the summer, then again, perhaps not. Either way life goes on, with or without me, so I just have to tag along. I submerge into an hour long blissful sleep before I re-enter the realm of the bustling society. I had just stopped to smell the roses, and they smelled celestial. It was just too bad that they were more ephemeral than anything.

I am drinking Solomon's Seal Tea, also called Doong-gul-leh tea in Korean. I actually wondered what Solomon's Seal was and Googled it, and came across Kgrocer.com and Opane.com. You can now purchase various Korean products, even if you live far away from a major Korean community! They are a bit pricy, especially some items on Opane.com, but the amount of relief of nostalgia will be worth the price, to those homesick and longing for home.

Solomon's Seal Tea tastes like Korea. It's hard to describe its taste, because I have never experienced such a taste in anything American or western. It's sort of nutty, and although it is supposedly an herbal plant, it doesn't seem too herb-like. It's smooth, but toasty.

I know there was no smooth transition for what I am about to write. It seems as though that I am a confident individual, who takes pride in that fact. But I have such a hard time giving myself a voice. It is hard to speak for myself, and say what I want, because I fear I will offend people, ruin relationships, and sometimes out of laziness, because saying what I want and explaining myself thoroughly takes effort. I want to be great. I don't want to settle for average. I want to be vocal, and live life with a passion. I want to sing and dance, although I can do neither well, and bask in the joy of doing as I please, without recognizing the stares of stand-by-ers. I want to say what I want to say, and not be afraid. I think the first step in doing so is to become more proficient in speaking. Speech was the most difficult class for me. I, who was once destined for the Ivy covered halls of great universities, failed speech 101, and then proceed to drop the class in my second attempt. Thankfully, third time did turn out to be the charm, and I passed. But speaking coherently is difficult, and it is something that is achieved through training, for most people, IMO. I need to do that. Secondly, I need to start getting used to the fact that I can't be on good terms with everyone, and I need to be willing to offend some people, if needed. I'm glad that I can do this on my blog and in writing, but speaking does have the immediacy and a personal touch that blogging often lacks.

I hate it when I have naggy customers. They leave me no peace to blog. (sigh)

There was a better place for the post that previously existed here, so yipes. I wiped it out.

I have included a link on the left to Margaret Cho's blog. I found her to be very funny and as a Korean American, her short-lived All American Girl was definitely worth its shot. But then after the show was cancelled, I heard stories about how she lived a loose life, filled with sex and drugs, and that caused my heavily conservative face to cringe. I came upon this blog somehow (I don't even remember) but I feel blessed because I have. She is definitely a character, which is a great and important thing in my opinion. I don't have half the character she has. But regardless, I found her blog to be eloquently written, sharp, humorous but not without a spine. There's actually alliteration incorporated -- in a blog entry, of all things! She strings words together artfully, and I am ashamed to be co-existing in cyberspace, because my writing, more often than not, seems dull and child-like... like a child's finger painting. Mine is the work of a toddler, and Miss Cho's work is Monet. (I'm a Monet/impressionist fan.)

Please go read some of the entries -- I, myself, have just begun reading some of her work. There isn't much famous Koreans in the U.S.. It is sad that when Americans try to think of a Korean person, they think of Kim Jong Il, the president of North Korea, who is often portrayed as a crazy lunatic by cartoonists. Cho has lived a rock and roll life -- and I don't mean rock and roll as all drugs and sex and craziness. Her life is loud, she is vocal, and she speaks out. She is passionate, and she has an attitude. But she is human, and she is not without flaws. But in spite of it all, she is a beautiful human being, and I'm not sure I measure up to that (not that I'm competing or anything). I admire her. Perhaps one day, I, too, can effervesce with such a passion. I know I am not completely without talents, but the honing of the given talents is perhaps more difficult of a task, than actually finding the talent itself. I hope that one day my life's passion will blossom into the levels of a Monet painting.

Here is an interesting take on the whole Bush Immigration issues, written by the Economist. It is titled, "The Huddled Masses Can Stay," which echoes a very saddening yet provoking sentiment. Perhaps it's just me. But the words of Emma Lazarus inscribed on the Statue of Liberty has been made false and I personally feel betrayed, after spending nearly a decade in public schooling, praising the U.S. 's history of immigration. I am excited about the steps being taken on this issue. I hope things will start rolling soon.

It's sort of quiet today, which is nice. The weather is fantastic. The skies are clear and high, with a touch of blue, and it's not even that cold. My weather. My best friend and I are going to have a relaxing time today -- sort of a continuation of a spa day. We're going to some facial pack and hopefully other facial care, while watching the all new episode of Friends and ER. She's leaving in less than 48 hours -- how I will miss her.

Click here to be sent to the original place. Below is the copy and paste of something I wrote (or a questionaire I answered) in February of 2003. I just re-read it and it's so hilarious -- sometimes I make myself laugh very hard, which is definitely a good thing.

B A S I C Q U E S T I O N S [my name is]: Haemi

[in the morning i am]: Oscar the Grouch [all l i need is]: security. Fresh ground coffee & coffee maker. Also, alcohol, and keep'em coming. [love is]: ethereal. [if i could see one person right now]: Dad. [im afraid of]: Heights. Bugs. War & Terrorism. [i dream about]: More often than not, about being chased. Hunted, more like. H A V E Y O U E V E R . . [been in love]: I really don't know. [drank alcohol]: of course. Still do. Most of my blood is actually alcohol. [lied]: I have a hard time lying. I'm not a good liar. T H I S O R T H A T . . [coke or pepsi]: Coke products. [flowers or candy]: Flowers. [scruff or clean shaven]: Either way. If he's a man, I'll take him! [tall or short]: Again. If he's a man... W I T H T H E O P P O S I T E S E X . . . . . [what do u notice first?]: the way he presents himself [last person u slow danced with]: It my 21st birthday, with my ex. [worst thing to say]: You're the fattest thing I've ever seen. W H O . . . . . . . . . [makes u laugh the most?]: Jim Carrey in Dumb & Dumber [makes you smile]: My kitty Cat, Nabee. [gives u a funny feeling when u see them]: All the customers who walk into the store I work in. They make my face turn green and give me butterflies in my stomach -- the way that an object you abhor will do to you. [has a crush on u?]: I doubt that person exists. [easier to talk to: boys or girls?]: Really don't like talking. D O Y O U E V E R . . [sit on the internet all day waiting for someone special to I.M. u?]: Maybe in high school [save aol/aim conversations]: couple of times a while back... now I have this thing that automatically saves everything onto an "aim log." [cry because of someone saying something to u]: No. Sticks and stones may hurt my bones, but words can never hurt me. H A V E Y O U E V E R [fallen for ur best friend]: yes [been rejected]: yes [rejected someone]: yes [used someone]: they reaped benefits unknownst to them, I swear. [been cheated on]: hopefully no. [done something u regret]: Not too many... W H O W A S T H E L A S T P E R S O N [u talked to]: Crystal [hugged]: Crystal(that was in November, 2002. I don't usually hug. It's not my thing.) [u instant messaged]: Trancelegend [u laughed with]: Crystal, about curry and book-uh-gook(??¾î±¹) D O Y O U [color ur hair]: Sssssh!! Everyone thinks this is my real hair color! [ever get off the damn computer]: Only to commute to work and home and school. [habla espanol]: Quiero escribir mi blog en espanol, pero no tengo el poder. H A V E Y O U/ /D O Y O U/ /A R E Y O U [smoke]: pass. [obsessive]: about life [could u live without the computer?]: What a scary notion. [how many peeps are on ur buddylist?]: 15 [what's your favorite food?]: Food is my favorite food. [whats ur favorite fruit?]: Korean pears... the really gigantic round kind... [drink alcohol?]: I think this was already asked. [like watching sunrises or sunset]: sure. why not. [what hurts the most? physical pain or emotional pain?]: Physical. I'm strong enough to get over emotions, but have low tolerance for physical pain. [trust others way too easily?]: I don't know. F I N A L Q U E S T I O N S [i want]: Good health for me and my family [i wish]: World Peace and Joy for all mankind -- hey, its MY wish, I'll wish for whatever I want. [i love]: My cat. My family. Crystal. My car. My friends. [i miss]: having a boyfriend. [i fear]: not living upto my own expectations. [i hear]: the comforting low humming of my computer [i wonder]: how long I'll live and what kind of life I'll lead [how do u kno its love?]: There's no sure way. [i am]: Haemi. Nothing more, nothing less.

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It appears that Mr. President is scrambling to get an advantage in the polls by trying to work the pathos of the Hispanic masses. I'm glad that at least the issue of immigrants, as well as undocumented immigrants, is being discussed, and that the discussion is taking course in a positive direction. But I'm doubtful on this new attempt on immigration regulation that Bush has proposed. As I have vocalized with intense fervor and passion, I am not much of a fan of the current immigration-handling department. I didn't like'em when theys were INS, and I don't like'em now when they're BCIS! They work extremely slowly -- I do believe that trained monkeys would be more efficient. Although it does depend on the schedule one is on, receiving a permanent residency (a.k.a. Green Card) can take longer than a decade! My mom has filed for a green card since she is a close relative to a U.S. citizen -- this was in early 2001, when some bogus law called 245i or something to that extent. So it's been nearly 3 years so far, and no news! According to my lawyer (who is not a scamming sneaky lawyer off to rip off money from poor immigrants -- he's worked with my family and extended family for 20 years... in short, a trustworthy man...) we can expect to wait another 5-8 years before getting a response. My visa application had some errors and kinks to be worked out, so it is taking triple the average time of one year. My brother's visa will probably take shorter, but I would still estimate it to take at least 18 months. Possibly 2 years. By which time he will probably not even be a student much longer.

Lack of tactfulness or promptness is not the only problem I see with the current immigration process. Technology falls very behind in this department. Perhaps each worker at the BCIS has a nice imac or whatnot on their desk, but there is a definite lack of communication or completeness to their work. There is always a loophole. They make a lot of errors. A lot of paperworks get lost. Mails get lost, and there is no way for status to be checked, neither by phone, nor through a website. Of course this isn't a company that profits much from processing such applications -- however, as an organization that represents a sector of the U.S. Government -- especially for a country that was founded by immigrants -- needs to be run with class. None of that inefficiency, irresponsibility, and impotence should even be an issue! This isn't Afghanistan! This is the United States of America, the super power nation of earth! Its government needs to run more efficiently. The lack of efficiency alone is shameful enough. Pull your act together, dammit. And please, stop embarrassing yourself!

My best friend and I went to a Sauna. We were short on time and didn't have dinner, and went into the hot rooms (temperature: 58 degrees Celcius!) and the steam room, and I was pretty worn out. I felt very dehydrated (as I do still have frequent bouts of diarrhea) as well as hungry to the extremes, and didn't make the most of the $15 I paid, according to my best friend. But my skin does feel softer, and lying around on hot bamboo floors did relieve a lot of tension and stress, so all in all, it was a good trip. We went to get pho afterwards. We had pho and summer rolls (very tasty!) and came home feeling very satisfied.

At my house, I further expanded my best friend's knowledge about blogging -- I always felt like the blogging aspect of my life had to be hidden from her because she sent out vibes that blogging was nerdy -- at least that is how I felt it. But I think she didn't quite know what it was about, and when she saw it in action and saw the plethora of blogs out there, she was intrigued. She actually set up her own blog at blogger, besides the Xanga that we created before. The blogger blog will be for her personal use, just as a journal that she keeps that nobody else reads. At least no one she knows. Well, it is getting late, and I must get to my beauty sleep. Goodnight everyone!

Just a note about my schedule -- tomorrow is dinner with my best friend's parents (who are like my own parents) and Thursday is the ultimate TV night, and Friday is the last night that my best friend will spend with me, so we'll have to do something special. So I'm on a tight schedule -- please accept my apologies that my blog isn't very worthy of attention at this point. I'll resume regularity with good content starting next week.

My co-worker had a family emergency to attend to, so I was left all by my lonesome at work. It was not that busy -- I think brisk would be the appropriate word to describe business today.

I had fun today. I didn't have work, so my best friend and I went shopping, eating, more shopping, took some pictures, ate some more, and went to visit the Santa Monica Pier. I'll have some pictures posted as soon as the battery on my digital camera finishes recharging itself. I'm tired, the bottoms of my feet are swollen and tender, but it's been a good productive day. I got much done with my best friend that we've been trying to get done -- shopping, having lunch together (it is really rare for us to have lunch together, as I always have lunch at work) and took some pictures together, and also had dinner together. We had a good time. I also got myself a pair of jeans from Express (because I had a Gift Card) and went to Victoria's Secrets for their Semi-Annual sale (my best friend keeps a keen interest in those types of news). I am pretty low on funds, because not only have I shopped enough to last through 2004, I also got my hair done on Sunday. My hair is layered, sleek, and it is a black color but with a slight violet tint that is visible in bright lighting. It's a much healthier look than the previous faded light brown color (my hair is very thin and the natural black color fades into a mousy brown as it ages). Good bye split ends, and hello bangs! I got myself a handful of bangs, which are a bit of hair that lines the border on the forehead area that is cut shorter than the rest -- usually to the length of the actual forehead, so that the hair reaches or is near the level of the eye brows. I'm quite satisfied with the results. Before I hated getting my hair done because it felt like not only a waste of money, but also a waste of time (normal process takes about 2-3 hrs). But last Sunday's experience has given me a more positive outlook.

As far as the update on the flu, I still have the cough, but it has gotten significantly better. And my throat doesn't hurt as much either. But the only bad thing has been the recent dryness and a constant thirst. It is very strange indeed. I'm always thirsty. It's an unpleasant feeling. I had lost a total of 7 lbs from this flu because I wasn't able to eat or keep food down, but lately I've been compensating for that, and I am now up 3 lbs, which results in a net weight loss of 4 lbs. Not a pleasant way to lose weight, but I need to find some positive aspect of the lengthy illness I had endured, other than the immunity to this particular virus which probably would never return (since there is a plethora of viruses for the cold and the flu, it is unlikely that a same virus would strike again). As one of my New Year's resolution is to lose weight, I'm taking it as a good sign. I will start working out again about next week or so, when I expect the cough to be fully eradicated.

I haven't had time to do much else. I did make a Xanga for my best friend (Xanga, because her sister uses it, and also because it is much more user friendly than Blogger or any other), which is kind of a shared blog between us. It is at Xanga.com/longingu2 and you can see some pics uploaded already. We'll upload more pics of us taken this winter. But unfortunately, she does go back to Iowa on the 10th, and I will not be seeing her until May or possibly August. We'll enjoy the time we have together. I haven't had much time to do anything else.