It's a very quiet day. It's been quiet -- time passes slower when there's nothing going on. I do think that mental time, as opposed to actual time(measured by the clock), is much more important.

I went to pick up my new glasses and new contact lenses yesterday. I think my prescription is overwhelming -- I got a slight headache wearing my new glasses yesterday. On some people, glasses look very stylish. It is a hard concept for me. Never would I have believed that glasses can actually be fashionable -- but apparently, on the beautiful people, it can be. For me, I've worn glasses since the second grade -- when I was 19, and was first fitted for contact lenses, I was just glad to have been liberated from the binding shackles of spectacles. But as I am getting a tad bid older, my eyes tire easily, and frequent dryness has actually made the pendulum swing back into wearing glasses. I tried so hard to pick something at least remotely fashionable. Oh, how I wanted to be the model in the magazines, looking so chic with tortoise shelled rims! I ended up paying a good deal of dough on a new pair -- I've had the same glasses since the 10th grade, and that's been quite a while ago now. It's plastic, which a thicker edge, so it can hide the thickness of the lenses -- I have such poor sight... I am one of those wearing the coke-bottle glasses. Well, long story short, it didn't quite matter that it was something made by Calvin Klein... I still looked like the matron from a strict boarding school for girls. Nerdy, but mature -- like I belong in a library. Oh well.

I did horribly on the exam last night. It was exactly like running into a brick wall. Imagine yourself, sprinting in a 100 m race at the Olympics. Imagine, suddenly a brick wall, solid as rock, appears infront of you. Imagine that you are a very very fast runner. That's what it felt like last night. I saw these problems... and I did not know where or how to begin. I wanted to die. I predict something in the range of a "D" for the grade of this exam.

Math exam is in about 5.5 hours. Still trying to get some more mathematical elements into my head. Apparently, osmosis does not work. Sometimes, in times like this, I go into prayer mode. God, if you help me pass this exam with an adequate grade, I promise to become a more productive individual -- I'll get up early and exercise, volunteer at local children's hospital, cut down on caffeine, and stop calling my brother "dumb-ass." Five minute into that pseudo-prayer, I realize. I'm an atheist -- and even if there were a God, be him/her/it Zeus, Shiva, Ifrit, Jesus, or my cat, the deity would hardly care if I exercise, or cut down on caffeine. So why do I do this? I also say "god-dammit" when I am mad... which makes my best friend rather uneasy(she's Christian). I also refuse to capitalize the word "god." Actually, perhaps I should capitalize it, since the word "god" refers to an actual name of the god that Christianity worships. Hmm. I'll think about capitalizing "god" but I refuse to capitalize the "H" in the world "he" or "him" or "his" and etc.. when referring to pronouns and possessive pronouns and whatnots refering to the deity. I need to study. My gawd.

I read a part of Chicken Soup for the Nurse's Soul 101 at my local Barnes and Nobles. I actually sat down and read the first two chapters and I cried, because they were so moving. They make those chicken soup for everyone... teens, moms, womens, single dads, you name it, they wrote it. Well, there was this one particular phrase... I can't remember who said it. It was a quote... in fact, I can't even recall the exact wording, but it said something like... the person who enjoys his labor blah blah blah. I think the basic point was "A person who enjoys his labor has everything and then some." So eloquent when I paraphrase, I know, I know. =o)

I've been procrastinating for weeks now, and I got what was coming. The calculus exam is in about 19 hours. I could have started studying the minute I got off from work, but of course, I procrastinated some more. After all, it wouldn't be much of a procrastination if I got started on it so early in the evening -- even though it's just the night before. So it is past mid-night. I'm having my second cup of joe, and still I haven't quite gotten down to it. Using "trigonometric substitution" to integrate a function, "integrating a rational function by partial fraction," and then "improper integrals" -- all sound just so enticing. I don't know if I can take such excitement in my life. Blech! Maybe medical school is not worth this crap. Who gives a hoot about a calling anyways? I might as well join forces with all the other drones and spend the rest of my life toiling away, performing meagre tasks that will pay the bills. It's really hard to choose! Should I suffer through this course of calculus so that I can move on to better things -- i.e. play a role in reforming the world to be a better place for all human-kind, i.e. bringing world peace, finding cure for AIDS/HIV, finding a vaccine for all cancers, enlighten the general populace about the meaning of tolerance... etc.. etc.. OR, drop this God-forbidden calculus course and become a drone. I know most of y'all are familiar with the verb, to drone. However, the noun that I use, drone, actually refers to the male honey bees (working honey bees are asexual) who were born only to mate with the Queen bee, and therefore do no work during the course of their life. I see a lot of people who are drones. Those who fight the daily traffic, those who do not enjoy their labor, those who live life simply because they prefer it over death. I think the pro and cons show that I should just take calculus and try my best to pass it. I may sound cocky here, but I have a firm conviction that I was born with a purpose. My presence on this planet will be one that influences millions. In a good way of course.

I am really tired. I am probably making no sense. However, I must get back to solving more integrands... Somebody save me from this madness...

Guess what time it is?!?!?!?!

It's time for a complete Blog overhaul!!! Yay!!

There comes a time in one's life when it becomes absolutely imperative that you blog. Right now, is one of those times. I came back about an hour ago from a UPS location to pick up the digital camera I had ordered. The Canon Powershot S400 -- a sleek platinum camera that is compact but definitely not flimsy. It has so much functions -- I'll be buried in its manual (both the English and Spanish versions!) all week. I have already mastered the simple stuff -- the functions that constitute a point-and-shoot camera. I took about 4 pictures randomly -- one of my mom, one of my room, one of my bookcase, and one of my stuffed animal, Eeyore. Not exactly something that will hang in a museum someday, but it sufficed in allowing me to demonstrate and examine my goods at hand. Even when I zoomed in all the way, the pictures were crisp. I cannot describe it. All I know is, I took a picture of my book case from about 4-6 feet away, and when I zoom in, I can read the titles of all the books on the shelf. I can also see who signed my presidential scholars award I had received in the 6th grade(Bush, Sr.).

It was actually attempted to be delivered on Friday, but no one was home to take it. We missed the UPS guy again today, and I couldn't risk having one of the neighbors sign it and take it for us -- my brother is still missing a shipment from Gap.com. Apparently some person whose last initial is "K" has signed for it and that person has yet to have been found. Anyways, it was about 30 miles from work, and 20 miles from home. I had to take the 2 N then the 210 W, all the way into the heart of the Valley, driving over mountains and hills to get to my camera. Dusk fell swiftly in the valleys between the hills -- finally the last of the sun's rays disappeared over the mountains, and it was dark. I listened to a Clay Aiken's radio interview, but wasn't at all interested. There were more important things on my mind.

I found the UPS location hidden between some hills, and waited for my item to arrive. (I had passed the UPS truck earlier on the freeway -- I had an urge to honk from behind him so he would drive faster than the 65 perfectly-legal-miles/hr.) When I got the item, I signed for it, and I ran to my car and opened the box hastily with my keys. In my nervousness and excitement, I fumbled the keys as if I were a three year old with limited motor skills. I finally got it opened and took a look at it. It's silver-ness glowed from inside the box, blinding me. I wanted to take it out and look at it, but it was dark and I didn't want to risk dropping it or ruining it. I waited months for this, and a few more minutes were nothing.

On drive home, I blasted old blue eyes(Sinatra) while I skidded downhill at 75 mi/hr(yes, I am quite the speeder). I lowered the windows and felt the breeze caress the hair around my temples. The sparkly diamonds scattered over the hills glittered vibrantly -- most of them yellow, but peppered with some red ones and white ones. Although I am not rich enough to live in one of those specks of jewels that garnished the hills at night, I felt like one. I am going to take pictures of everything. The ubiquitous cigarette butts on the streets of Los Angeles, the bright city lights, the solemn nightfall and day break of its glorious mornings -- the gas station, the library, the schools -- my cat, my family, my work, -- the grass on the rolling hills, the full moon -- everything! If I can see it, I will record it into my precious Canon S400. I can't wait for the battery to finish charging.

I need a new template for this blog. The orange writing and the background seemed to go perfectly together, creating a nice autumn-y feel, but in truth, as many have reported to me, it is a bit hard on the eyes. Because I write this blog to be read, I need colors and template that are a bit more easy on the eyes of my readers. So I am in search of a new template. It is rather difficult for me, because I really have this great need for my writing to appear clearly, and yet, I have trouble denouncing my attraction for a fancy background photo. So off I go, once again, to give this page a face lift that it deserves. Just in time for winter too.